Status and Overhead

date: 2018-12-31
belief: emotional
status: notes

Since August, I have been overly concerned with status and overhead. I’m taken up with status, I think, because it’s new to me. Prior to Boulder, I was in Olympia, and I didn’t interact with anyone (in person, at least) who actually put me into rank.

I’m newly stressed out by “overhead”: both in the sense of labor-time and in the sense of being plainly confused.

(Perhaps I should have taken more rigorous prerequisite courses? Or exerted myself more diligently over the summer prior to graduate school?)

Here’s a skeleton argument to dismiss both concerns as frivolous and distracting:

Each of the 5 days before finals I felt decent: I could work all day, I was competing directly with myself, and I wasn’t responsible for new material. I also settled into a paper-based workflow. I carried around a few notebooks with as many practice exams as I needed, and I stopped updating